My kids Grandparents   Leave a comment

My kids Grandparents are wonderful, loving people.  I wish that we got to see more of them but that seems almost impossible.

I’ll start out with my parents.  My parents divorced when I was 13 or 14, and my Dad moved to Connecticut.  Both of my parents have since remarried and are both happy.  My Mom and step dad live in southern Maine, and my Dad still lives in Connecticut.  My Mom and step Dad visit at least once a month, and normally a day doesn’t go by that I don’t call and put them on speaker phone so that they can talk to their “MeMe and Papa Bob.”  I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I know how badly my Mom misses them when she isn’t here and if she could do anything about it, she would.  They are actually thinking of relocating someplace a little closer to us, so that they can see the boys more.

My husbands parents live about 10 minutes away.  We drive by their house a couple of times a week, when we go to Machias to get my step kids.  The boys will cry when we go by, that they want to go to “Gee and Grammies’ house” and I always feel horrible that I don’t just pull into the drive way so they can visit.  And for that, it is my fault.  the problem that my husband and I have is that they hardly ever come to our house to visit with the boys.  You see our house is “baby proofed” so that we know they can’t get into things that they shouldn’t.  My in-laws are always down near us, they just don’t stop in a lot, and I’m not sure what the reasoning is behind this.  I do however feel as though the boys are loosing out on a relationship with their grandparents.  Both my husband and I both have these feelings, and when he talks to his parents about it, they stop by a little bit more often, for maybe a week.

My Sister in law and her husband and 3 girls live just about 5 minutes away.  They don’t see the boys much either, they are always busy running to a basketball game or just something with the girls.  Their oldest daughter babysits a lot for us, and for that we are very grateful.  They love when she comes over, they practically tell us to leave.  My in-laws are constantly over to their house, visiting, or running to the ball games with them.  I guess what really gets me, is that to go to my sister in laws house, they have to drive right by the road to get to our house.  They could always come “down town” a little earlier and stop by, but they don’t.  I don’t understand how they can be so close to some of their grandchildren and yet so far away.

When we had the boys, and they came so early, we ended up in Portland Maine, and Maine Medical Center.  If it weren’t for the NICU at MMC, my boys wouldn’t be here today.  There is no other way to say it, I am very thankful for MMC, because the boys being in Portland, ment that I got to be with my Mom the whole time they were in the hospital.  My Mom never missed a day, visiting with the boys in the hospital.  It was great to be so close to her, and it made me feel better about going home for a couple of days at a time because she would always make sure she went in a spent some time with them.  I remember how badly she cried when we took the boys home.  She knew it would be the beginning of the monthly trips to my house so she could see them, and she has never missed a visit.  I guess where I am going with this is that while the boys were in the hospital, my in-laws came down every sunday to see the boys.  They never missed a sunday, and there were even a couple of times that they were able to come down during the week to make and extra visit with them.  It was always great to see them when they came down for their visit, and I know how hard it was for them, they would get up and on the road by 4 am to get down to Portland, just to visit for a couple of hours and they were back on the road by 3 so that they could get home in time to relax a little bit before they started their work week the next day.  I just wish that they could give the boys that time now.  Just set a chunk of time aside and come visit them.  They hardly know their grandparents and it makes me very sad for them.

Growing up, I knew all 4 of my grandparents very well.  Of course, we were living in the same town as them and it was easy to go visit.  I remember spending many over nights at my grandparents houses, with my sister and my cousins.  Those are the memories that I cherish growing up and all I wish for is that my sons could have the same type of memories with their grandparents.  My mother has had the boys for all of the over nights that I have been away. She is the only one who has ever had them for long periods of time and if she had it her way, she would have them all the time!

I guess I just want to know how people can be so close to others in distance, and yet seem so far away at the same time.

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Posted February 8, 2011 by mytwotornados in family

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